I have been feeling lately that we are in a bit of a rut. Perhaps it comes from having tried to learn so much so fast, and immersing ourselves in this new world of ASD and all its ramifications. No doubt some of it comes from how busy we are as a family. I know that is derigeur for families these days, and likely it has always been that way except in the strange world of idealized TV families, but I would wager that ASD families are busier than most. It just seems that we were always looking at, or for, new information and had new things to discuss for K. Lately I feel that is not the case as I languish in front of the TV complaining about the mind-numbing drivel that is on.

Perhaps I can blame some of it on the time of year, with too much to do, the ever-shrinking daylight, and the seasonal “west-coast sunshine” it may be no wonder I feel that nothing is getting accomplished and I fear that K may be suffering for it. Or maybe, just maybe I have come to some level of acceptance about K’s “diagnosis” and all that we are doing to help him reach his maximum potential. And, to be fair, we have been quite relentless in trying to learn as much as we can about ASD and current treatments that are available so perhaps we are just in need of a well deserved break.

Since we received his diagnosis in June 2006 we have tried very hard to educate ourselves so we could rest assured we were doing all we could do help K and making informed decisions on his behalf. In fact, truth be told, we have done this at the exclusion of almost everything else. There was no conscious intent to have all other aspects of our lives be put on hold, it was just the result of feeling so strongly about what was required of us and our desire to get it done. Perhaps that is the natural first stage of dealing with having an ASD child, frantic education and mobilization of available resources.

Would then the second stage be a degree of normalization and less feelings of immediacy? We work very hard to ensure K is getting all that he needs to be his best, for after all that is all we have ever wanted for him- diagnosis or no diagnosis, just now much of the very intensive first stage has been completed. Is this the natural expression of this very important transition? These feelings of wasted time and a small amount of guilt when there is still so much to read on the subject, there is research to be done and new treatments to investigate may just be phase 1 hangover. I have read on numerous occasions that having an ASD child is a marathon not a sprint and perhaps we have just come to that realization and are just now feeling competent and confident enough to slow our pace. I think Tracy and I will always feel some degree of urgency. We know that time is against us as many treatments are most successful if initiated at an early age and K is now close to the ripe old age of 4 but we are confident in what we are doing and the results we have seen to date.

However, once the silly season is over I plan on re-dedicating myself to the cause. Though I continue to add new information to the documentation part of the site I often do not have time to read it all. This is one area that I am hoping to improve, as well as doing more reading on ASD sites about what other families are doing and finding success with. Part of that goal will be keeping this portion of the site up to date with what we find and our thoughts on the various topics that fall under the ASD umbrella. I also want to get more information on the site specific to K and what we are doing and our thoughts on their outcomes. In short I want to return to the original goal of the site; to organize and share information about ASD and track our experiences with K.

There, I’ve done it. A New Years resolution with time to spare!

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